Mediation and the Family Court Process

August 20, 2025

Table of Contents

Mediation and the family court process – Family breakdowns can be tough. It does not matter if it is about kids, money, or what to do next after a breakup. Trying to fix things can feel like too much to handle. But the good news is that there is a better and more peaceful way than going to court. Family mediation is the answer and can help you.

mediation and the family court process
Mediation and how it works in the court process

We explain how mediation works in the UK family court process. We will talk about when you need to use it and how it can help you solve problems in your case. Mediation may help you get a result faster. It could save you money, and it can be less stressful for you and other people involved. Mediation in the family court is there to help people work things out in a better way.

Mediation and the Family Court Process – What is Family Mediation?

Family mediation is something you choose to do. It is a way to solve problems between family members. A trained and neutral third party, called the mediator, helps those who are separated or family members. The mediator talks with the people to work through disagreements. In the end, the goal is to find solutions together through this dispute resolution process.

It’s commonly used for:

  • Child arrangements (who the child lives with or who the child spends time with)
  • Money and property matters
  • Parenting concerns or when you have a different point of view
  • Support payments (like child or spousal maintenance)

Mediation and the Family Court Process – Do I Have to Try Mediation Before Court?

In most family law cases in England and Wales, you will need to go to a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM) before you can make a court application. This meeting is there to see if mediation could work in your case.

Mediation information is shared at this meeting, This assessment meeting helps everyone understand the steps they can take. Mediation can often let people sort things out without going to court. A MIAM is an important step in the process in England.

There are exceptions, such as:

  • Cases that be about domestic abuse
  • Urgent cases, such as when a child be taken away or there is risk of harm
  • Cases where the other person do not want to come

If mediation does not work or if the other person says no, the mediator will fill out a form to show this. You can then apply to court.

Mediation and the Family Court Process – How Mediation Supports the Family Court Process

Mediation and the family court process. Court is a good way to help. But mediation often happens before any court proceedings take place. This gives people a chance to talk. They can try to work things out by themselves, and courts usually want them to do this.

Here’s how mediation can help:

  • Reduces conflict – Mediation lets you talk things over in a calm way, instead of fighting through lawyers.
  • Saves time – Mediation helps you both reach an agreement in a few weeks, not several months.
  • Cuts costs – Mediation most times costs less than going to court.
  • Gives you control – Mediation puts you in charge, not the judge.
  • Less stress for children – When you handle things calmly, it helps keep the children away from fights. This way, the kids feel more at ease while you work things out.

If you and the other person both agree, you can turn these plans into a legal consent order. The court can make sure that everyone follows this if needed.

Mediation and the Family Court Process – What Happens in the Mediation Process?

Here is what you can expect if you are thinking about mediation:

1. MIAM (Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting)

Your first step is to go to a MIAM (Mediation Information Assessment Meeting). A MIAM is a first meeting with a mediator. In this meeting, you and the mediator talk about your situation and look at whether mediation is the right step. Each person will usually attend this first meeting on their own. This is the start of the mediation process, and you must do this before you begin mediation.

2. Joint Mediation Sessions

If you and the other person both agree to go on, there will be mediation sessions set up. Each one of these usually takes between one to two hours..

During each session, the family mediator will:

  • Makes sure that both people get a chance to speak and be heard
  • Helps you see what issues need to be fixed
  • Guides you to find fair and real solutions
  • Encourages people to talk with respect and stay calm

The number of sessions you have depends on how many things you want to sort out. Mediation does not have a set time to fix your problems. It is there for you for as long as you need to work out solutions.

3. Reaching an Agreement

If you and the other person reach an agreement, the mediator will write a ‘memorandum of understanding’. This paper lists all the things that you both have agreed on. The memorandum of understanding is not a consent order, so it is not legally binding on its own. But, if you want, you can take it to the court to get a consent order. This will make it legally binding.

Child Arrangements and Mediation
Do I need to mediate to go to court around my children

Mediation and the Family Court Process – What Can Be Resolved Through Mediation?

Mediation can be used to solve many kinds of problems that happen in a family. Mediation can help with the following:

  • A child arrangements order covers things like where the children will live, what will happen during school holidays and birthdays, and who will make important choices for them.
  • When talking about finances, this means how assets, savings, and debts will be split.
  • Spousal or child maintenance is about agreeing who will pay what and when.
  • Pensions and property look at what will happen with the family home or any pension plans.

Mediation is easy to adjust and can fit what every family needs. It takes care of the whole situation and is made to help you and your family find ways to solve the problems you have. A mediator will talk with you at your initial meeting, which is known as a MIAM. At this first talk, they will learn about your goals and will see how they can help you with mediation.

Mediation and the Family Court Process – What if My Ex Won’t Attend Mediation?

You may find that even if you have had your MIAM, your ex may refuse to do theirs. Mediation is voluntary and you cannot make anyone take part in it. But you still have other options if this happens. If you want to go on with family court, you can use your MIAM assessment certificate. This is what the court will need to let you apply to start child arrangements in a legal way.

Mediation and the Family Court Process – Is Mediation Right for Every Situation?

Mediation is most helpful when both people want to talk and are open to finding a middle ground. But it is not always the best choice. Mediation may not fit if:

  • There is some history where one or both people feel scared, have been hurt, or have had threats made.
  • One person will not join in fully or does not take part the right way.
  • One person is hiding money or is not being honest.

Mediators will only move ahead if mediation is safe and right for everyone. Sometimes you and your ex may feel that you cannot talk to each other anymore about child arrangements. This often makes people think that mediation is not suitable. But there are special types of mediation, like shuttle mediation, that can help you both. With shuttle mediation, you and your ex do not have to talk to each other face to face.

Mediation and the Family Court Process – How Much Does Family Mediation Cost?

Costs of mediation will be based on how may sessions you need. To see what our costs are, head here. You may be able to get help with the costs of mediation through Legal aid or the Family Mediation Voucher Scheme. Legal Aid is there for people on a low income or if you get Universal Credit.

The Family Mediation Voucher Scheme is set up to help families around family law without having to go to court. The voucher will pay for up to £500 of the joint costs of family mediation and it is not based on your income. It does not pay for the Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM).

Mediation and the Family Court Process – Is There Help Available For The Cost of Mediation?

If you do qualify for Legal Aid, you will have to pay for the first assessment yourself. Legal aid can pay for the MIAM and the joint mediation sessions. The mediator will look at your information and tell you what you can get help with. They will help you apply for any funds you can have. This is all done before your mediation, so you know the costs you need to pay before it starts.

Divorce and Mediation
Do you need to go to court or can you mediate
Mediation and the Family Court Process – Preparing for Mediation
  • Try to stay calm and keep an open mind. You might not get everything you want. Still, you will most likely find a fair place to agree on.
  • Bring the right documents with you, such as those about money or your children if those topics will be talked about.
  • Get legal advice. You do not have to use a solicitor during mediation, but getting legal advice may help you know your rights.
  • Focus on finding a solution. Mediation is not about trying to win. It is about going forward and working things out.
Conclusion – Mediation and the Family Court Process

Mediation is not just something you do before going to court. It is a real chance to find a way that works for everyone. Mediation helps you keep the relationship safe, and this is very important when children are part of it. You get to be in control of what happens, and everything stays private. Mediation can help you, and the other people involved find solutions.

If you do not know if mediation is the right choice for your family, you can go to a MIAM and learn more about it. Mediation can help you save time, money, and a lot of stress. So you might want to try this option first. Speak to Trusted Mediators on 03300 101 306 to find out more.